Week 9: Internet

Week 9- Internet

Karan Abrol

JDate

Three years ago, in Bangalore, A family moved into our gated community from New York. The couple seems extremely functional and suited for one another. At a dinner party at their house the question of online dating came up, and they revealed that they met online on a site called JDate. Everyone at the party was surprised- no one could have possibly guessed that the couple didn’t meet in the real world. They seemed to have a real, genuine relationship, and are raising a wonderful daughter, who my sister spends a lot of time with and gets along with despite the slight age gap between them (sister is three years older). When they were asked how they met, the guy told us he had been looking online for a while (supporting the idea that dating seems like “shopping” to some researchers and academics studying this), and one day “[He] widened his search parameters… and there she was!”, as he looked at his wife lovingly. I remember that line verbatim because it was so amusing to me that two people could put in so much romance into a line like that. A few adults in the party even giggled slightly, but the couple did not see any humour or irony in the line.

This being my first and only experience with online dating, I am openly biased towards the idea that online dating does not necessarily have ANY negative connotations, and is capable of forming extremely healthy and happy lifelong relationships. Statistics mean nothing to the individual, and I think it’s very possible that the unhealthy symptoms found in people who use online dating may very well be more because of the fact that people who use online dating sites tend to already be prone to unhealthy relationships or fake identities in the real world, rather than being pushed towards it by the phenomenon itself.

My stance on online dating is extremely positive, though I do not care for it myself. My personal preference is towards real world relationships, that involve the ability to meet someone for the first time in person, simply because I think those situations make me more comfortable. This does not mean that someone else’s preference to an online relationship should ever, in any way, be diminished by predudice towards the information age and it’s effect of social interaction.

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